A self-reflective diary: a speech from the president of "English MouMou"

    To begin my diary, I think I can't help but admit that I am lost somewhere between my ideal and my reality. During my junior year in America, I believed that I had discovered my destined way to go, and what I can do is just run to the end of the way. I tried my best, while I was living in there. However, now I am getting to realize that even I am not at the entrance of the way. Still my belief is very firm - and it is also the reason why I named my blog as it is - no matter how many mixed feelings visited me without any notice. I was nothing but a drifting ship on deep blue sea, relying on shimmering light comes from far away.
    After listening to the speech, I felt at least some crucial parts of my agony was washed away. Unconsciously, I kept being afraid of failures and mistakes in front of me, even though I was self-hypnotizing that I am not afraid of such a thing. I have some selected ways to go; I don't know what is a detour or a shortcut. I was obsessed with running all the way to the shortcut with all my might. 
    From my freshmen year, I was always an earlier person than others. I was able to perform as others do despite of three years of age gap, sometimes outstanding, though I could not have mature thinking. Perhaps I did know the answer from the time: whether a way is a detour or shortcut, the ways have their unique strengths and weaknesses. If the way I chose turned out to be a detour, I can just keep walking on the road, without complaining, because it is all rewarding process. The detour would teach me meaningful life lessons a lot more than the shortcut does. I was worried being left behind, even though I knew that it is totally "okay" to be left behind. I just hated to admit the fact. The imaginary role model of "Miso" in my mind should be successful than anyone at all times.
    The speaker let me realize, sometimes it is okay to be left behind, because I have infinite opportunities in front of me. I heard similar statements times after times, but it is the first time for me to realize the real meaning of the statement. The examples he adopted were by all means truly meaningful, because it told me something about life experiences. Sometimes those life lessons are a lot more important than theoretical lectures. Generally, I thought that the speaker and me have very similar personality and value system. Perhaps this fact has moved my mind.
    I am still drifting this borderless sea only with shimmering light, but I think at least I've got a strength to keep looking for directions from his speech.